Match Review: Newcastle United 0-0 Brighton

Neo: Whoa, déjà vu.
Trinity: What did you just say?
Neo: Nothing, I just had a little déjà vu.
Trinity: What did you see?
Neo: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it.
Trinity: How much like it, was it the same cat?
Neo: Might have been, I’m not sure.
Morpheus: Switch, Apoc.
Neo: What is it?
Trinity: Déjà vu is usually a glitch in the Matrix.

Great film isn’t it, the Matrix? Keanu Reeves kicking the shit out of Agent Smith, those never-done-before slow motion fighting scenes and an authority figure justifying taking recreational pills to escape reality. Rather like a Saturday night in Haywards Heath.

And that déjà vu scene has earned its own place in popular culture. It’s rather like Brighton’s Premier League season so far, which is turning into one big glitch in the Matrix.

This particular glitch has nothing to do with black cats and everything to do with the Albion not taking their chances. And it could prove costly come the end of the season.

The latest instalment came at St James’ Park on Saturday. The final score may have been Newcastle United 0-0 Brighton, but really the Albion should have won – and won convincingly.

Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? West Ham United at home should have been three points rather than one. Southampton at home could have been at least one and possibly three had Florin Andone not lost the plot.

Burnley last week was another point dropped. And then we come to this trip to Tyneside, where a dominant first half in particular didn’t get the result it deserved.

You could make the case that the Albion should be on 13 points by now and even OJ Simpson’s defence lawyer would struggle to argue against it.

That would put us third in the league, which is why so many Albion fans remain excited and upbeat about the impact that Graham Potter is having.

Except of course we aren’t third in the league. We’re 15th with six points from six relatively easy games – Manchester City aside – and having scored only twice since the opening day of the campaign.

And that’s a problem. Anybody who doesn’t think it is doesn’t understand the way the Premier League works. “The goals will come” they say, but will they when our next two fixtures are against Chelsea and Tottenham Hotspur?

Especially when we cannot find a way past a poor Newcastle, waste countless opportunities against Burnley who score with their only shot on target and struggle to get through West Ham.

There were more than a few comments on Twitter comparing Brighton’s performance against the Toon Army to Barcelona. But nobody is going to remember how we passed, pressed and attacked at St James’ Park if we’re visiting Kenilworth Road and Oakwell next season.

In every game we’ve played so far since Watford, there’s been one opportunity missed that has been so bad that we can recall it weeks later.

Some of you might even wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night when your brain decides to replay them. I do, and I can tell you my girlfriend isn’t impressed when I’m screaming “FOR **** SAKE LOCADAIA” in my sleep at 3am in the morning.

We’ve had Neal Maupay scuffing wide from six yards against West Ham. The aforementioned Locadia hitting the upright when completely free at the back post against Southampton.

Leandro Trossard smashing a shot into the ground at Manchester City which saw it bounce into the head of the grateful Fernandinho on the line. Davy Propper’s free header which went over the bar against Burnley.

This time, there were actually two golden chances to take the three points. Maupay was guilty on the first occasion when he could have played the simplest of passes to give Steve Alzate an open goal but instead tried to shoot.

Then in the second half, Aaron Connolly lobbed Martin Dubravka but Fabian Schar just about got back to produce an acrobatic goal line clearance.

That one wasn’t so much about the quality of the finishing but more the brilliance of Schar, but if we do end up in the brown stuff come the end of the season it’s another moment that we could look back on and think about what might have been.

Alzate did have the ball in the back of the net after a brilliant passing move from front to back but that one was ruled out for offside. Aaron Mooy could also have opened the scoring and Pascal Gross had a couple of half chances.

Ah yes, Potter deployed Mooy and Gross in the same team. This was another game in which his team selection had everyone wondering about who would be playing where when the sides were announced.

After last week’s four centre backs in the starting line up, this week we had four central midfielders. Dale Stephens, Propper, Gross and Mooy all started and Alzate was also in there for good measure, a young player who nobody seems to know the actual position of.

Once we’d reached the away end at St James’, taken on some oxygen and paid the Sherpa for getting us up there, it became apparent that it would be the normal 3-4-3. Alzate was in for Solly March on the left and Mooy would be playing up top alongside Maupay and Gross.

The travelling support were in good voice but there was a real sense of apathy among the locals with this being Newcastle’s lowest home attendance in the Premier League for nine years.

Much of that is to do with the Toon Army staying away due to the basket case ownership of Mike Ashley. While it might not look good to have so many empty seats, if the plan is to hit Ashley financially by boycotting then it’s hard to see how that will work really.

It’s a well-known fact that every Premier League club could give away every ticket for free due to the ridiculous amount of wealth that the television deals provide.

As long as Newcastle remain in the top flight and on that gravy train, a lack of ticket sales won’t bother Ashley. More of a reason for the locals to stay away seems to be apathy because of what is happening on the pitch.

You can understand that given that they’ve replaced one of the best managers in the world in Rafa Benitez with Steve Bruce, a bloke who is papped on holiday because he looks like a beached whale.

Those Newcastle fans who did turn up weren’t exactly given value for money by their team. The hosts were awful, particularly in the first half.

Bruce tried to play down the fact that the Albion had 71% possession, but that’s a damning statistic. His side were at home to Brighton, not playing away against Manchester City or Liverpool. Watford had a bigger share of the ball than 29% at the Etihad Stadium on Saturday and they lost 8-0.

Of course, Newcastle aren’t the only ones who should be worried by that figure. On the flip side, you can say that it’s criminal that a team who have 71% of possession away from home fail to score, but we already know that.

The empty seats and the domination of the men in green meant that the atmosphere inside the stadium was extremely subdued. Only when Andy Carroll was introduced with 30 minutes to play for his first appearance back in black and white for nine years did the decibel levels increase, and that also led to Newcastle’s best spell.

Most of us could see what was going to happen at that point. It’s what we call “Typical Brighton”. The Albion outplay their hosts, miss countless opportunities and then Carroll pops up with a 91st minute winner with Newcastle’s first shot on target in front of the Gallowgate End.

Carroll’s presence did lead to a bit of panic in the Brighton back three and we were hanging on by the final few minutes. It would have been a travesty had Newcastle scored, but there’s always the risk that will happen when you don’t take your opportunities. A better side than the Toon would have punished us.

The BBC summed it up best in their match report. “All style and little substance” was how Emlyn Begley described the Albion’s performance.

Potter needs to find that substance and fast. As good as the football has been, if we have too many more glitches in the Matrix then this could turn into a long, hard winter.