All I want for Christmas is an 18-0 defeat at Norwich

There is a very good reason why football historians do not include wartime football in their records and statistics – because of results like Norwich City 18-0 Brighton & Hove Albion.

The Albion’s visit to Carrow Road on Christmas Day 1940 resulted in the biggest defeat in the six seasons played throughout World War II. It was an extraordinary game played out under extraordinary circumstances, even by the bizarre standards set by wartime football.

Officially, every game played in wartime football was recorded as a friendly. Players could make guest appearances for other clubs. Often it fell on teams to organise matches between themselves.

Some clubs ended up fielding starting XIs made up of youth team players and others simply failed to turn up for games due to reasons out of their control. There was a war going on, after all.

There were the games that started and never made it the full 90 minutes. Southampton’s visit to the Goldstone in September 1940 lasted 210 seconds before the Luftwaffe arrived. Needless to say, that one did not count towards the final league table.

The Saints’ next visit to Hove a month later did however – even though it lasted only 45 minutes in total, 20 minutes before an air raid saw everyone head to the shelters and then another 25 until the German air force came back for another go. A hard-earned point for both sides in a 0-0 draw.

Then there was how the league standings were calculated. Because there was no certainty that teams would play the same number of games, tables were decided on goal average for the 1940-41 season. Norwich smashing 18 past Brighton in 90 minutes propelled them from 16th to sixth for just one morning’s work.

All of which makes it easy to understand why wartime football does not lend itself to the official books – or why you you would never want to use a Unibet promotional code on the outcome of a game, if such a thing existed in the 1940s.

After all, it was less about sporting competition and more about giving the under-siege people of England something to look forward to in-between bombing raids and the threat of Nazi invasion.

Yes, even an 18-0 defeat away at Norwich was something for Brighton & Hove Albion to enjoy. Not only would they enjoy it, but it also meant that the Albion kept intact their proud and impressive record of never having cancelled a scheduled game in wartime football.

Not many clubs could say that. Even the mighty Arsenal failed to raise sides on occasions. The Gunners had been due to visit the Goldstone a month before Brighton went to Norfolk for a match that the Albion had earmarked as a much needed money spinner.

Arsenal pulled out late in the day on that occasion. That was not something that Brighton manager Charlie Webb could countenance doing – even if it meant travelling to the longest away game of the season on Christmas Day with just four players.

Quite why the Albion and Norwich were playing on the holiest day of the year we will probably never know. Brighton were sent to Norwich on Boxing Day in 2002, but in 2023 there would be outcry about making fans travel such a distance over the festive period.

And yet here were Brighton making a 350 mile round journey on Christmas Day in the middle of a war. While a national campaign discouraging unnecessary travel was going on. “Is Your Journey Really Necessary?” was the slogan. Apparently, Norwich v Brighton was.

Webb and his four players had made the trek to Norfolk on Christmas Eve. In the travelling party were the experienced Joe Wilson and three youth team players – Roy Watts, Charlie Chase and Charlie Harman. The plan had been for the rest of the team to meet them there. When this did not happen, Brighton had a bit of a problem.

Norwich asked whether the game should be scratched. Webb wasn’t having that and instead, the stewards at Carrow Road went around the ground asking for volunteers to pull on the blue and white of Brighton to get the fixture played.

Eventually, 11 players were cobbled together. There was a regiment based in Norwich at the time featuring a number of Bolton Wanderers players and while several of the Trotters were turning out for City, centre back Jimmy Ithell was free and available to play for the Albion.

The remaining six places in the team were filled by a mix of Norwich youngsters and servicemen and civilians pulled from the crowd who fancied having a go.

1,419 supporters turned up at Carrow Road and they were greeted by an Albion line up which read:

1) A Bartram – One of the men pulled from the crowd. But if you are going to play just one game of professional football in your life, what better way to do it than by conceding 18 goals.

2) Roy Watts – Right back Watts played six wartime games for the Albion – and one against them when Charlton Athletic turned up at the Goldstone a man short and he agreed to switch sides.

3) F Pinchbeck – Another man pulled out of the crowd, Pinchbeck played at left back.

4) Charlie Chase – Chase played sporadically for the Albion throughout the war whenever his military duties allowed it. He served in Egypt, Palestine and France where he was wounded and invalided out of the army. Chase ended up making 26 appearances in total and signed professional forms once the conflict was over, although he never played a Football League game for Brighton. He went onto play for Watford and Crystal Palace.

5) Jimmy Ithell – Norwich 18-0 Brighton wasn’t Ithell’s only appearance for the Seagulls. He also turned out in a 2-0 defeat away at Tottenham Hotspur three seasons later. He never made a competitive appearance for his parent club Bolton, moving to Swindon Town in 1946. He played 107 Division Three South games for the Robins before becoming Boston United manager.

6) Derek Dye – Dye was a Norwich City youth team player who agreed to pull on the stripes to help out the Albion. It appears that this was his only appearance for either Brighton or Norwich.

7) Charlie Harman – Considered one of the best young prospects on Brighton’s books, Harman made his wartime debut as a 16-year-old six months before the Norwich defeat. He scored four times in 18 games between 1939 and 1941, after which he graduated as a fighter pilot and saw action in Italy. Following the war, he played for Worthing

8) S Bird – Bird was the third man to be pulled out of the crowd. He played at inside right.

9) WA Stacey – Stacey started up front after answering the stewards call for volunteers. Given the final score, it will come as a surprise to nobody that he had very little to do.

10) Joe Wilson – The only senior member of Webb’s squad to make it to Carrow Road. Wilson had arrived at the Goldstone from Newcastle United for £450 from Newcastle United in May 1936. He played 353 times for the Albion in the Football League and wartime football, scoring 49 goals. Upon retiring, he became assistant trainer and then head trainer. In 1963, he took charge of the first team for nine games as caretaker manager. None of those games saw Brighton lose 18-0 to Norwich.

11) A Smith – The fifth and final player found from those in the crowd. Smith played outside left.

Norwich were 10-0 ahead at half time and added just another eight in the second 45. Fred Chadwick, an Ipswich Town legend who turned out for their arch rivals during the war, scored six times with a hat-trick in each half.

Marshall, Roberts and Sid Plunkett were the Canaries’ other hat-trick scorers and Howe scored twice. The mathemiticians of you will have worked out that totals 17, the other goal coming from the unfortunate Ithell who marked his Brighton debut by putting through his own net.

Webb said after the game that he was proud of his players for never giving up – in particular Wilson, who can’t have played in a more surreal game than this.

Wilson never stopped running despite the ridiculousness of the situation; it was little wonder he was a solid fan favourite at the Goldstone both as a player and on the coaching staff for over 30 years.

The action at Carrow Road was not the only strange score line on Christmas Day 1940 – it turned out to be a day of high-scoring games across England as 210 goals went in across the country.

Other high scorers included Southend United beat Clapton Orient 9-3, Bournemouth hammering Bristol City 7-1, Mansfield Town beating Stoke City 7-2 and Bury and Halifax Town sharing a 5-5 draw.

Leicester City and Northampton Town even played twice. The Foxes went to Northampton for a a 5-2 defeat in the morning and the teams then traipsed back to Filbert Street to have another go in the afternoon, Leicester turning the tables to win 7-2.

That was wartime football though. Completely mad. Norwich City 18-0 Brighton & Hove Albion is testament to that. Merry Christmas.

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