Brighton v Arsenal – Half-and-Half Heaven
A glamour FA Cup tie with one of the big boys of the Premier League is a great thing for all manner of reasons. The chance of an upset live on television. Seeing some of the finest players in the world perform at the Amex. Spending hours creating the perfect tin foil FA Cup.
Arguably the best reason of the lot though is the half-half merchandise. Needless to say the Brighton and Hove Albion merchandise machine has roared into gear and you can purchase the standard issue item of a half Brighton-half Arsenal scarf.
But are the Albion not missing a trick here? Are scarves not just the tip of a glorious souvenir iceberg? We think so – and for no cost or commission have come up with a list of things that the Albion should be pushing to commemorate the glorious day when The Arsenal came to town. You can thank us later, Mr Barber.
Half-Half scarf
It is the original and the best and is available from the Seagulls Superstore for what we are sure is a not-at-all rip off price. The half and half scarf serves two purposes. The first is as a memento of the game, the day that the great Arsenal visited the Amex to take on lowly Brighton. The second is for those Arsenal supporters who have become Brighton fans since the Amex opened – don’t deny it, we all know someone like that – with it allowing them to not have to chose between the two on the day. Genius.
Half-Half shirt
Following on from the idea of the scarf, this is a step up in the scale for the undecided fan. Taking the left half of a Brighton and Hove Albion home shirt and the right half of an Arsenal home shirt, you can split each one down the middle and then join them back up to create the ultimate reminder of when the two sides clashed. There are a world of possibilities for this particular market, with our favourite being a mash up of the Seagull’s orange third kit and the Gunners fuchsia and navy away kit – the sort of colour combination not seen outside of a late 90s rave.
Half-Half what we’re famous for
Brighton is famous for its rock. Arsenal are famous for their players that smoke. This novelty item combines the two, with one half representing a stick of rock such as the ones you can find in former Albion manager Chris Catlin’s shop on the seafront and the other representing a cigarette such as the ones that Wojcieh Szczesny enjoys in the changing room toilets after an away defeat. There are some obvious health drawbacks to the rock-cig and the market is limited as they can only be sold to over 18s but it will surely prove popular with Szczesny and Jack Wilshere.
Half-Half celebrity fan
Mankind has managed to clone a sheep and do all kinds of weird and wonderful transplants in the name of medicine. This plan surely cannot be a bridge too far then. Take Brighton supporter Fatboy Slim, split him in two and then pair him up with the corresponding half of Arsenal fan Piers Morgan. What do you get? The ultimate half and half celebrity fan. Yes he would whine incessantly about wanting both Arsene Wenger and Chris Hughton out, kiss up to Kevin Pietersen in a worrying manner and be generally despised but he’d be a bloody good DJ.
Half-Half last trophy won
Arsenal ended a nine year wait for a trophy when they lifted the FA Cup last season while the Albion last won something meaningful (Sussex Senior Cup’s don’t count (and are too hard to Photoshop)) when the League One title was lifted in 2011. What better way to celebrate the meeting of two historic sides than by taking the most recently lifted silverware for each and employing a skilled trophy maker to cut both the FA Cup and League One trophy in half and then weld the two pieces back together as one glorious cup.
Half-Half stadium
The ultimate of the half and half project comes in the form of the half-half stadium. Both the Amex and the Emirates are recognised as being two of the finest grounds in the country, so imagine if you combined them? By carefully knocking down half of Arsenal’s home, you could transport it brick by brick and rebuild it at Falmer. The positives are endless – increased capacity and a massive clock on the roof being just two. Planning permission might be difficult given it took a decade to get the get The Amex built but if you don’t think big in the 21st century you get nowhere.
